A big presentation. A high-stakes meeting. A career-defining performance review. An uncomfortable personal conversation.
We are faced with situations that make us feel anxious every day. But have you ever wondered what happens to our brains when we are under pressure, and why performance often breaks down in these moments, even when we are completely prepared?
MCB’s most recent Women In Business series event, held on June 4, featured this very topic. Dr. Nassim Ebrahimi, Founder and CEO of Ebrahimi Consulting and Becoming My Stronger Me, joined MCB consultant Chrys Sbily, who served as moderator, for an engaging discussion on training your brain for high-stress situations.
Dr. Ebrahimi, known as “Coach Nassim,” is a developmental psychologist, mental performance coach, author and speaker who specializes in helping athletes and executives develop the mental skills required for sustained performance and personal growth. As MCB welcomed her to our virtual event, she explained that her passion for this subject started in her youth. Coach Nassim was 13 years old when her younger sister was born. She grew up observing her sister develop and mature, and witnessed the differences in the way they were raised. These insights inspired her to study how people learn and how brain development impacts behavior. Pursuing a career in teaching, she worked in higher education before pivoting to individual coaching, using the mind-body connection to help people become the strongest version of themselves.
Physiological Responses and Why They Matter
Coach Nassim explained what happens to our bodies when we are stressed. There is always a biological response; for most people it is increased tension in their muscles, for others there is less tension. There is also a heart rate change, and change in breath pattern. These are core programmed responses, Coach Nassim explained. She added, “Stress isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Rather than focusing on your stress as bad – ask yourself, does it make me more or less productive?” She added, “We don’t get frustrated or stressed about things we don’t care about it. So, pause…ask yourself if this feeling is productive or not. Keep the focus and energy on the productive outcome you want.”
Tips for Better Performance
When preparing for high-stakes meetings or presentations, Coach Nassim suggested we be cognizant about the time we spend worrying, as it takes away from the time we can devote to actual content. She recommended conducting mental rehearsals and visualizations on how things can positively proceed. Prepare by rehearsing for what might go wrong, and ask yourself how you will handle those circumstances. If you have a plan, you will be less frazzled because you have visualized a successful outcome.
She added, “I won’t say don’t get nervous or excited, because all emotions have value. Rather than silence a critical inner voice, we need to hear the voice and learn how to turn it into productive action.”
The “saboteur,” what she calls that critical inner voice, is revealing something to us, she explained. “Learn from it, train yourself to know when it is happening, and then decide how to manage it to become more successful, rather than let it paralyze you. Don’t silence the voice, manage the saboteur. You can respond: ‘I hear you, but I got this in this moment.’”
Another tip Coach Nassim shared to help us stay focused and calm is a simple breath exercise. A longer exhale than inhale immediately drops the heart rate. If you are feeling anxious, give yourself a few breaths, focus on the productive thing you want to do next, set the intention of that, and then execute that one thing.
She also suggested journaling as a way to grow, and suggested answering these questions on a regular basis: What am I proud of today, what feedback did I receive that I want to consider, and what do I want to focus on next time?
The Confidence Equation
We all want to feel confident in times of stress, but it’s not easy. Coach Nassim developed what she calls a confidence equation:
CONFIDENCE = Trusting Your Skills + Owning Your Role
She said, “To be confident, you should focus on keeping the equation stable and balanced and try to keep the highs and lows to a minimum. There will be ebbs and flows, so have trust in the role you are given and know your skills – the skills to adapt, to lead, to mentor, to provide calm. Then reflect on your ‘superpower skills’ to balance the confidence equation. Use your powers…and you will perform from a place of strength and confidence.”
When asked for a final key takeaway for the audience she added: “Pausing is OK. Busy is not always productive and successful. Give yourself a moment.”
If you’d like to learn more about Coach Nassim, including additional resources, books and articles she has authored, and her podcast, visit becomingmystrongerme.com
MCB’s next Women in Business Series event is coming next spring. Follow us on our social channels and make sure to subscribe to our blog to stay in touch!
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If you have any suggestions for future Women in Business series topics, we’d love to hear from you! Kindly submit them to us at [email protected].